This week I had a rough time taking LG to a meeting with me. I came home and I was pretty much ready to quit. I came home all sorts of flustered at my inability to engage when I have her with me. Feeling like well Seminary is going to be about class only because I seriously can't commit to anything else because taking care of LG comes before all that. Taking her with me often is more work than it's worth because I don't hear a word.
I was here ready to just let things go and move back into the cave, exiting only for class. Then one of my new friends was like, it's a learning process you are both learning how to be in meetings together. LG has to learn and you have to learn to be able to engage, she will be fine. It occurred to me sometime later that since said friend goes to said meetings and she isn't going to let me quit. Actually I can see her showing up at my door and dragging me across campus.
When I told Paul about that conversation, I kind of whined I am not going to be able to quit. He responded with, "You mean she went all Beck on your ass? And you didn't freak out?" Ouch! No I didn't freak out because I appreciate that someone is finally telling me like it is and not dancing around it. I think people are intimidated by my tell it like it is ways at times, either that or people just really don't like to.
This week I have a friend who is like me, who isn't going to let me quit when it gets hard. I rather like having a friend who calls me out on my shit. It's REFRESHING! It might have been her grace in doing so as well because there are others who haven't been shy about it but their word choice always stung a bit. This week no stinging just gratitude for a friend who gets me and calls me out when I want to throw the towel in on meetings and motherhood.
Today I am grateful for new friendships, friends with courage & grace, friends who understand what it means to be a mother and called to serve God.
May you be blessed with deep and loving friendships that you need in your life.
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