Tuesday, November 30, 2010

There are many things I could blog about today but most of them seem a little pointless. Just a random smattering of things that happened since I last blogged. However I feel compelled to blog today. So I am opening up the floor to you, my readers. Ask questions, send suggestions, nominate topics.

Monday, November 29, 2010

A thought from my reading...

I have been reading Shane Claiborne's Jesus for President. This is a wonderful read and really challenges those of us who have a deep Christian faith. The title is misleading, as you might have guessed if you are familiar with Claiborne's work. Anyhow, this morning I was reading and a thought struck me so powerfully that if it wasn't a library book I would have highlighted it. So here it is in a horribly butchered from my memory version.

The kingdom of God is all about love. Acting in love at all times in small ways. I knew this but it changed something for me. I am very justice oriented in my life and faith. That grows from love, I didn't really connect that before. I know this radical idea of loving each other is a stretch. I think Jesus and Shane are onto something here. If we could remember to love, it would be a better world.

I wish I had read this before I sent my LPTS application. It would have made for some wonderful quoting. The topic of my essay was working together towards a common goal rather than letting "issues" tear us apart as a church. Just showing love for the other, would have worked quite well.

These books always challenge me to go deeper and I am thankful for that. I feel as if I am reading the writing of a close friend even though we have never met. That is blessing at it's best.

May you be blessed by being loved and loving today!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Christmas is Upon Us

I begrudgingly removed all of my fall decorations and packed them away last night. Always a sad time because Fall is my favorite time of year. Christmas is actually one of my least favorite holidays because of all the pressure and lack of focus on the actual miracle of Christmas in the first place. I am trying to get around all that this year and enjoy the quiet. I do not want to get wrapped up in the hustle and bustle that makes me hate this time of year.

Here it is the day after the day after Thanksgiving.

The Christmas season has been in full swing since midnight Thursday, at least commercially. Sunday will start Advent for Christians. A time of quiet preparation. Seriously. I don't know that anyone can be quiet and focused in Holiday preparation. People forget about Jesus' birth all together. I am not judging because I have been there. There is something about Christmas but more so Advent, there is this kind of Joyous Hope that comes for me. When I listen to the "church" Christmas tunes this hope that comes washes over me. I am reminded that nothing is impossible with God. One of my favorite Christmas time scriptures. Maybe it is because I have seen a couple of Christmas miracles in my time.

Let me share some with you, first there was the year my dad came home from the hospital just in time for Christmas. He had been living in hospitals and rehabilitation centers for nearly a year after his illness first hit. It was a very joyous day when he came home just a few days before the big day. I venture to say better than Christmas itself. This was also the year my mother had gravely prepared us that there wasn't going to be much of a Christmas because we didn't have money for it. Christmas Eve as family was visiting, my dad's friends from the Turnpike (where he had worked pre-illness) dropped off two huge black garbage bags for me and two for my youngest brother. I remember so clearly my mother's tears of relief. I am sure there have been others. The last I will share though is just before Christmas 2 years ago when we found out we were expecting. It made Christmas simply amazing. I shared in Mary's wonder at being with child. Clearly I wasn't quite as amazed because well I was no virgin. Gasp shock I know! I had actually partaken in some loving. Anyway though I remember wishing I could scream with joy in church. Pregnant at Christmas really worked for me.

This year I am trying my hardest to capture the quiet and hopeful joy of Christmas. I am intentionally trying to make it a quiet time, so I don't get pushed in with the masses of over consumerized sheep rushing to buy the next great gift for my sister's cousin's bus driver. I am nearly done with the shopping. The decorations will go up later today. Then all that is left is cookie making later in December. In theory this means I can actually be quiet and enjoy the season and the hope that comes with it.

May you be blessed with this quiet hope-filled joy this Advent as you prepare for the birth of a little baby boy, who will change your heart and the world.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Oh Boy

One last Thanksgiving thought, there was also a Thanksgiving were my cousin was in labor the night before and my mom was so anxious we stayed up all night and set the table. That was 21 years ago! Can you believe that?

Now on to "Black Friday" thoughts. I shop on black Friday. Only for items that I would buy anyway. Really you aren't saving money if you go out to buy some movies and come home with a TV you didn't need. I try my hardest not to fall into the traps of the day you know when you feel like you have to buy it because it is a good price.

Last night Paul and I ventured out to our local Toys R Us. They were opening at 10 pm and I wanted to pick up some wrapping paper that wasn't on sale. Also some books for gifts. I didn't feel the need to stand online for these items. So we headed out around 10. Much to our surprise there was still a line when we got there around 10:30. This was no small line. This line wrapped around the store and all along the fronts of all the other stores there. This line easily had a couple THOUSAND people on it! So we did what anyone would do, first I said um yeah I am not waiting on that line to spend $12. Then we parked the car and people watched for a good hour. We made up stories and wondered what the deal was they were after.

Then I had a serious thought, What would Jesus think of all of this if he saw what the celebration of his birth has done to people? This was crazed consumerism at its best which is really humanity's worst. Blindly grabbing at deals to teach the children stuff can make them happy because we believe stuff will make us happy. This was a sobering thought. I myself was there to be a part of this crazed consumerism.

Although I wasn't looking for much. We ventured across the street to the mall napped in the car and went in a midnight for a few things. It was craziness all around. Luckily I knew exactly what I was looking for and got in and out with out lines. I steered clear of stores with any sort of electronic door buster that was bound to make people loose their minds. We headed home because the other stores I was looking to shop at weren't open. We slept a little headed back out took our time and managed for the most part to avoid crowds. Then we stood in line way too long to pay for a picture frame and I snapped at the woman trying to get me to save an extra 15% by opening a charge card. Really lady, I just stood here 20 minutes to buy a $7 frame. I do not need to wait another 20 minutes to save another $1. Then I knew it was time to go home because I was turning into one of those women I wanted to smack.

So it's true I got caught up in the consumerism of the day. I think God might be slightly disappointed.

Now on to the next project, what charitable project shall I partake in this Christmas?

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!

This will forever be remembered as the Thanksgiving I thought my mom bought the farm. Which an hour ago didn't seem so funny, but now has me splitting my sides. I woke up at 5:15 something was wrong. It was quiet. First thought, did she finish the stuffing already? I couldn't smell anything, no onions or butter or toast. Next thought, OMG she died in her sleep! I smacked Paul, wake up! Huh what? It's 5:15 listen, Yeah it's quiet that's kinda nice, Paul it's Thanksgiving and it's 5:15 smell (I make an obnoxious sniffing noise). Something is wrong, why isn't she up. I stumble out of bed and go make sure my mother is alive, let alone awake and she was. PHEW!

Some more Thanksgiving memories.

The Thanksgiving we had a snow storm.
The Thanksgiving I drank so much apple cider I got sick.
The Thanksgiving when I was about 7 and my mom let me carry the crystal tray and I fell and shattered it.
The Thanksgiving I learned to make crumb topping because I didn't have enough pie crust.
The year we went to the Macy's Parade in NYC.
How about the first time I cooked Thanksgiving dinner and I made a 20 pound turkey with enough side dishes and appetizers for 20 people for 4 people?

I am sure more will come later.

May you be blessed with Gratitude today!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Thanksgiving Memories

Every Thanksgiving I find myself reminiscing about Thanksgivings past.

Today I was thinking about the year Paul and I went to the National Youth Workers Convention and tried to drive home Tuesday night from Atalanta. We hit so much traffic we didn't get home until 7 am! Paul had to go into work and I had to make pies. We were like zombies. We learned to never travel that time of the week before Thanksgiving. At least not with out an alternate route. I don't know how we even made it home safely.

I can't get through a Thanksgiving with out remembering the year I accidentally smashed my sister's cherry pie. I will never live that down. I had my feet on the bottom of the table and it tipped over. I think I was about 10 when that happened. I have dropped many a dessert since especially pies.

I have very fond memories of my grandmother on Thanksgiving, which I am very grateful for. Most of what we will eat tomorrow were her family recipes. She taught both my mother and I to perfect them. As we made pies this morning I remarked, "Hey Mom, not to long before we will be teaching Lilia the tricks of the trade." As sexist as it sounds, I am so glad I have a little girl to teach it to. Mind you I would teach any of the boys if they were interested. I will say I have taught most of the boys the baking part. They do love to bake with me.

Lastly, every Thanksgiving I can't not think about my friends in Africa, especially Rhita. One day we had a conversation in the back of the Land Rover about our favorite holidays. I said Thanksgiving, she responded oh the one with the turkey. We talked about it for awhile and Rhita wished she could have a Thanksgiving celebration. Then we dreamed together of sharing a Thanksgiving meal. I think every year maybe next year will be the year we are together. I have a strong hope that one year either she will be here for the holiday or I will cook up a Thanksgiving feast for Rhita and Caleb and all the children in Uganda. That would be a challenge but I can handle it!

May you be blessed with gratitude the whole year through!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

In a "Mood"

I am not sure about you but in my house growing up if I was grumpy. My mother would say I was "in a mood". More likely, "Leave her alone she is in a mood." It has come to my attention that my mother seems to have a memory of me always being in a mood. Always complaining and never happy. This is odd because I don't think that is me at all. I do complain sometimes and who doesn't have a bad day now and then?

Maybe I just don't remember properly? I mean we all do things that annoy others and don't realize it. I am sure I have irritated the crap out of people and not realized I had done so. It's our nature. Generally speaking no one intentionally irritates the crap out of you, unless you have brothers in which case all bets are off. They make it their job to irritate you, at least in my case.

Lately though I feel like everything irritates me if it comes from certain people, it's a short list of about 5. I am aware of that and I keep my mouth shut but sometimes I just want to go off.

I don't even know if this blog has purpose today. Just trying to vent in the most kind and gentle way I can.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Christmas/Christian

I find myself in the same struggle every Christmas. What to buy and when is enough, enough? This has only gotten worse with having a daughter. Being Christian I know that Christmas isn't about the gifts, the trees or the cookies. It's about Jesus. Although even for me that is hard to remember at times.

It seems to me that Christmas is just over run with greed. A close second is stress. I can't help but think this isn't what it is all about. I also seem to get wrapped up in it anyway.

I have a really hard time thinking about what I want to teach Lilia about Christmas. Obviously there is the Christmas story, I don't mean Santa Clause, I mean Jesus' Birth. What about all the secular stuff. Santa is a resounding yes, we couldn't imagine her not knowing Santa. Christmas for me as a child was magical. The lights, the presents, the food, the company. Oh how I loved it. I want her to have that. Yet I don't want her to be drown in consumerism either aka greed.

I guess I have to find the balance for me.

This year I have put a lot of focus into shopping for Lilia, and getting it done early, so I can get the best price and enjoy the season.

I just want to say though, that still I struggle between drowning in the consumerist greed and resting in God's love.

Tell me I am not the only one who thinks this much about Christmas. It feels as if Christmas has become it's own God!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Help has Arrived

My mom came in late last night. I forgot how great it is to have her here. She has been in nonstop over the top baby mode. I read a full chapter of a book this morning with no interruptions. No pages got ripped. It has been fantastic. I know my writing has been very light lately. No worries I will hit you up with something remotely close to profound soon enough!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Thanksgiving Reflection

In case you didn't catch it before, I love Thanksgiving. It's not about the food for me. It's about the low pressure of the holiday and getting to have a lot of my family here and visit with them. This year we were preparing for a smaller holiday. I must admit I was kind of feeling a little sad but thought I guess it is just proof that things really are changing. Yesterday I learned we would be joined by my sister and her boys. Today friends of theirs too! I am excited! It will remind me of how special Holidays felt when I was a kid. I was always so excited to have a house full of people I loved.

When I am surrounded by people I am less likely to reflect on those who aren't there. The people who we have lost over the years. There is my dad who I spent more Thanksgivings apart from then with. There is Tim who I can't help but think of every Thanksgiving, remembering his humble prayer the Thanksgiving right after September 11, 2001. "God let us be grateful for our table that is so full, when there are so many that are empty today." In case you didn't catch it he meant with so many missing a loved one. My dear Grammy, who would be so excited to see her family all together. She personally would be on the phone this week appealing to those who had other plans. I love the way she would get all dressed up and then cook. Her stories though always the same never got old. Even my crazy old Uncle Chuck who passed this year. Although his life wasn't perfect we shared a lot holidays together and I can muster a few good times with him. My grandfather who was always just quietly there with us.

Kira who is still living but has left possibly the largest hole in my heart. She is so close by and I can't see her. That is harder than grief after a death.

All these folks have left empty spaces in our hearts and at our table.

I think it is why I am working so hard to try and get us back together this holiday season. I know one day someone else is going to be missing. It is after all the cycle of life. Even my siblings and I will perish and our children will be left hopefully maintaining our traditions and living life together.

I just want to enjoy the time I get with all my siblings and their families.

Sometimes all the grief is a blessing, it helps me to remember what is important now.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Johnny Rocket's & Trusting Your Gut

On Saturday, Paul and I stopped for lunch at Johnny Rocket's in the Monmouth Mall. It was kind of a splurge on lunch for us. Also a good way to avoid the food court. I am not going to lie their Orange Dreamsicle shake sign didn't hurt.

I was immediately unimpressed with our server. I just in my gut didn't like the way she looked at me. I did not comment on this or think much about it. We ate, felt rather duped by the way our order was taken. We order burgers, and the waitress asked fries or onion rings and I thought oh I don't know. She responded we can do half and half. Sure that works Paul ordered the same. Well guess what they didn't come with the meal and we dropped $6 on those sides. We could have lived with out them, or simply shared one plate full. We paid and left kind of unimpressed and annoyed.

You can imagine our frustration this morning when we noticed we were over charged a full $10 on our bill? Paul called to fix the situation. After I swore I would never patronize the establishment again. Much to his surprise at 9 am before the mall was open the General Manager answered the phone. He graciously took care of the billing error. Then explained that our waitress had been arrested for credit card fraud. He refunded our entire tip.

Now some thoughts, actually I feel that they should have refunded the whole purchase. Or at the very least offered an I am sorry gift certificate. In the end though at least the situation was fixed. Next thought I should have trusted my gut and paid with cash. I will no longer use my credit card or bank card for restaurant purchases. This was the third time we have had a billing problem.

Most shocking to me, we were the only people who had called about this problem. People seriously don't check their statements? Now we also need to call the detective who is handling the case. Our receipt is now evidence! I am thinking this is all pretty crazy.

Last thought, why didn't I trust my gut. I knew from the moment I saw our waitress that I didn't like her. We tipped generously as well! We also do. I wonder what made her think we would be good "victims"?

Then I have to take just a moment to wonder what was her motivation? Is she a sociopath? Just greedy? Does she have a little kid at home she is struggling to take care of? None of those thoughts justify the action, but I have to wonder which it was.

The Back Up Plan

So I decided over the weekend that if I get rejected from Seminary, I will become a baby factory and get a reality TV show.

What do you think?

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Social Networking

Maybe I am a little late on this one. I have had facebook since you needed an actual college e-mail address to get an account. I have embraced the concept of social networking for sometime. However, I found this week I am finally using it to connect with people and network. So instead of just using it to keep in touch with far away friends and family

I have found myself connecting with circles of like minded people. People doing amazing work for the Kingdom of God. I have been meeting and communicating with lots of younger folks with a mindset like my own. It gives me great hope for the future.

After spending some time visiting Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary last month I found my self energized about the future of the church. Since then I have found myself doing many things out of character for me. Reaching out to people I have never met. Attending events I would have never considered. It's a good thing all around.

Now if only social networking was used like this all time!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Memory

When I was a little girl I called my lower girl parts my tushy. Most people refer to the behind in this way. Imagine my surprise when one day my Aunt said she would spank my tushy!

Reflecting on this, I can't stop laughing.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

What I have learned...

As I continue to wait for either an acceptance or rejection from LPTS; I have time on my hands to get a little anxious. My head takes me all over the place. Really, I mean it, from jobs, to bed spreads, to childcare, to Christmas. It is enough to make me go crazy. However I am trying really hard to just let it all go, after all I can not do a single thing until I have an answer then I can prepare for whatever comes next.

Here are some positive things I have found myself reflecting on. I have found since my birthday, there are some good things coming to me at this age. I am certain it has nothing to do with age at all really, but I will take note that it is happening for me at this age which is easing the pain just a little. I am really comfortable being me. I know that seems like how it should be all the time but it isn't how we are wired. We live in a world where we are constantly comparing ourselves to others. Even the way we speak says this about us, it is obvious through choice of words and tone if you feel like you are above or below someone else. That being said, it is hard to stop comparing and stop living up to other people's expectations.

Maybe I should share some examples, we visited dear friends this weekend. Normally when we leave from visiting them, I am very insecure about my parenting abilities. I would like to point out that this is not an insult to my friends. They are doing an amazing job with their daughters. I really respect the hard work they are doing in order to raise their children well. That is probably why I usually feel like I am doing something wrong when we part ways. However this time I was better with it. I felt confident in my abilities. My only real comparison thought was that I didn't have professional portraits done sooner with our daughter. That's pretty huge for me. Another example, I read blogs that are just brimming with commentary on theology. I get theology, actually I rather enjoy studying it. I found my thoughts wandering the other day to, I wish I wrote like this. Then the next thought, no I don't. That's not my role in theology. I am more of a hands on kind of girl. I like to be out there doing things because of my theology. Then I reflect on them. My writing is directly related to actions. I know it's different and it might not get my voice heard but that is my role. My role isn't academic reflection (although my life choices considered I will have to academically reflect). What I am saying is I am a doer and then a thinker, not a thinker and then a doer. Both by the way are important roles to have in God's kingdom.

I don't own a house, I am no where near owning a house. Right now though I am so glad I don't own a house, it gives me a lot more freedom. I just had to get past the fact that everyone in our go go go buy buy and buy some more consumerist society will likely take one look at my lack of home owner ship and count it against me. That's OK. I know this works for me, for now.

There is so much freedom to be found in accepting your most authentic self. Somehow over the past few weeks I have really been able to be in tune with what makes me, me. It is pretty awesome.

Monday, November 8, 2010

I think it is when we realize that we are simply mortal; we begin the search for meaning. If we are open to it, I believe we find God. Mortality is always there in the back of the mind like a faint bell off in the distance; once you hear it, it never goes away. When we are consumed by fear of the end rather than God's love, it gets ugly.

That was my train of thought this morning as I read a couple of blogs and thought to myself what sets people of faith apart. I should note that you can define God however you choice, it doesn't have to be the God I know.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Internet

The internet has brought us a lot of ease in our lives. We can keep in touch with friends. Social networking, need I say more. Online bill pay. Google to find simple answers. Maps. Phone numbers. The list goes on and on and on.

It also however provides a way to be anonymously mean and angry. This is what I don't like about the internet. It often gives forums to people to say anything thing they want. Things I don't think they would say with out the safe shield of the computer screen. Let's be honest who hasn't said something in a chat or e-mail that they wouldn't say in person? Even the best of us have done it.

There in lies the problem. Now I know I am going to get some slack for this example but whatever we all have guilty pleasures. I enjoy watching the show 19 kids and counting, featuring the Duggar family. I do not agree with them on many things. If you know me you know the fact that I wore a dress to my own wedding was a stretch for me. I cut my hair regularly. I have NO desire to have 19 children. Politically and religiously we are on opposite ends of the spectrum. Yet I am fascinated by the logistics it takes to "run" a family of this size. So a week ago I googled a recipe that I thought I may have seen on their show (I couldn't remember where I saw it.) I found whole pages and blogs dedicated to hating this family. This family who these people have never met. While I understand putting yourself out there you are going to get critics, this just seemed so well mean. First of all who has time on their hands to dedicate whole web pages to this? Second would this happen if there was no internet? People would just be like that is ridiculous maybe send some hate mail or CHANGE THE CHANEL.

The problem is it's not just celebrity and reality TV types this is happening to. Watch the news and see all the teenagers taking their own lives because of online bullying.

The problem is two part really have you ever met someone who takes everything that happens on the internet way too seriously? I have. Sometimes you want to say it's the internet, not real life. I have been guilty of this myself. Then the things people say that are so well just plain mean. The non-editing because of the anonymity is dangerous.

There is also the illusion of knowing someone. You read a blog, friend them on facebook or follow them on twitter where they tell you what they ate for lunch. You begin to feel like you know them but you have never even had a conversation with them. This is especially dangerous for younger folks I think.

Lastly, my favorite, people who believe everything they read on the internet is true. I could create a website teaching how the sky is actually red and people might believe it because it is on the web.


It's a dangerous cocktail. All too often becoming toxic.

Just a reflection. Your thoughts encouraged.

Paul and Peanut Butter

My dear Paul loves peanut butter. He probably eats it once a day. We buy the jumbo two packs from Costco because he goes through it quickly. He likes to put it on toast, crackers and once in a while I catch him just eating a little spoonful of it. Sometimes I hear him and I yell from the other room stop snitching the peanut butter. It has become kind of a joke around here. I tell him he is going to give some one with a peanut allergy a reaction because it is going to come out of his pores soon.

Anyhow what I find more amusing than his actual peanut butter consumption is how precise he is with taking it out of the jar. I took some pictures which hardly to it justice but you will get the idea. As you can see there is clearly no peanut butter waste in our house!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Changes

Last week I finished my application for Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary (LPTS). It was a process to get done but it is done. Now I wait. Then I wait some more. This is all the norm when one sends an application to a school. I did check when we visited, they do work on rolling admissions so I do not have to wait until February or March to know if I have been accepted. However I don't know when word will come. It is a little nerve wracking. It brings up so many thoughts, mostly about moving.

I wanted to say though that I am starting to feel like myself again. I am feeling like I am going somewhere. That feels much better than the past two years where I felt kind of stuck. I have grand visions for the future. I guess I didn't know how much of a funk I was in until I came out of it. It feels good to be back.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

I didn't plan on falling in love...

Me with Sweet Mirembe July 2008

Two years ago, when I lived my dream of traveling to Africa, I knew my heart would break while there. I was prepared as one can be for the broken heart that comes with a trip to Africa. I have said it before, but just in case you missed it. Africa takes a piece of you when you go there. What I didn't plan on was falling in love with a little girl who was dying. When I say falling in love I mean it. I can explain it no other way than it was of God. From the moment we met my heart was hers. It didn't hurt that her name means peace. The word I have tattooed on my foot.

My sweet Mirembe was just 4 years old then. She had just come into the home where we were staying, adopted by our friends Caleb and Rhita. My understanding is that she had been abandoned by her parents because she had sickle cell anemia. That hasn't stopped Caleb and Rhita from loving her. Mirembe and I couldn't communicate with each other verbally as she only understood a tribal language. She had a beautiful little head with shave hair. He eyes were beautiful but they held a wisdom I have never seen in such a young child. Her body was small for four I think even by African standards. To me she looked to be somewhere between 18 months and 2.

I tried to play with her all week. I bought her a little stuffed toy in the market because African children do not have toys. Sunday afternoon though I had the chance to spend the whole afternoon playing with her. Near the end of the day, I was hiding behind the couch and popping out at her, after about four times of this she let out this belly laugh. Laughter translates through any language barrier, just like the baby's cries I wrote about on the Africa blog. In that moment, we were in a thin place where we understood each other. Rhita came running from the kitchen, Becca you made her laugh. She hasn't laughed yet. It was a simple moment of joy for me the Mzungu lady from afar and this scared little girl in a brand new place.

Mirembe a few months ago.

I get updates about Mirembe regularly. I call her my African baby. It has been a roller coaster of emotions as she gets ill and recovers. Today we received word that Mirembe has taken a bad turn again. She has become paralized on her left side, she is also loosing her vision in her left eye and can only take liquids. She has had a CT Scan and it seems her brain is covered in lesions. I don't understand what this means. It seems though the the pairing of the words brain and lesion can't be good. I started sobbing and shaking as soon as I read the e-mail. I also tear up but this is not my normal reaction. I told Paul I needed to take a shower so Lilia didn't see me all upset. When I said my African baby is sick he knew what I meant. I sobbed so hard in the shower. It felt like I was punched in the gut. I got out and I still wasn't done, I was whimpering. I felt all shaky. I had to take a few minutes to calm myself down. That is why I am here writing.


Two years and an ocean apart this little girls still has my heart. She taught be something about myself. When I met her, Paul and I were starting to accept that we most likely wouldn't have a biological child. The moment I saw Mirembe I knew I could love a child with a deep motherly love no matter how they came into the world. If she hadn't already been adopted and it weren't for those pesky legalities, I probably would have brought her with me. I have always had a gift of loving children and understanding them. At that moment though I knew that adopted children were in my future because I was aware of the depth of love in my soul. I have in some ways adopted Mirembe at least in my heart.

I can tell you this all was nothing less than being of God. Her laugh stays with me, her eyes cut through me. Her love quiets my soul. I don't know if she remembers me but I will never forget her.
Mirembe today.

Please join me in lifting her up to God today as well as Caleb and Rhita.


Addition:
I should add that in keeping with the original intention of gratitude on this blog. I am so grateful for our week together. Even more so for our Sunday afternoon and that moment of laughter. Some of the most precious moments of my life.