Yesterday I encountered three references to dating. One was on a blog, one in a magazine article and one on the radio. Gasp, yes I still listen to the radio! Anyhow this is a pretty ordinary thing to see or hear. Our culture can be a little obsessive about dating and finding "the one". This morning when I looked at said magazine I had this thought, I would be terrible at this thing called dating.
I never really dated. Paul and I started "dating" in high school, which pretty much meant we hung out after school. Sometimes we saw a movie. We almost always paid our own way. We rarely went out to a dinner that didn't involve a drive through. We were after all kids just 16 and 17. I guess we got it right though, because here we are 14 years later.
I have never had to survive a break up. I broke up with someone once but that's it.
I started thinking about how awkward dating would be. Going out with a stranger and trying to impress them. Maybe it's trying to build a connection but it seems like a big game at times. Then who to go out with and where to go and who pays? What if it lasts a while, then you have to decide if you want to have sex with the person. Which in my case might be a bit complicated since my future profession requires stronger than average moral standards.
What about if you aren't interested in the person? You have to let them down. That can't be easy because no one sets out to hurt someone when they agree to dinner. Or at I hope not. What if you get dumped? Is it really devastating? I guess that all depends.
The thing that most blows my mind about it all, is there is a whole period of time where you didn't know this person. You really don't know much of their past. What if they are a stalker? A murderer on the run? How do you know anything they say is true? Paul and I we grew up together, and most people even those from a city like Paul, don't commit major crimes at age 11.
I mean I know that dating is doable and I am sure enjoyable.
The whole concept to me though seems foreign. I guess that just shows where I have been. What my life experience has taught me.
You had to see this coming, today I am grateful that I am married, to someone with whom I share so much history.
May you be blessed with a good date with your spouse or other wise this weekend.